The following is a list with actual notes from parents (including spelling) to school offices: *My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him. *Please excuse Anne for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot. *Dear school: Please ekscuse Joe being ansent on Jan. 28, 29, 39, 31, 32, and 33. *Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak. *Sally win't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral. *My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines. *Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.